Tuesday, December 30, 2008


Hey there... well after being without internet for almost 3 weeks, I might need to take a "get to know the net" course again... it feels weird. Missed you all very much!!

I'll give a big update with Christmas news and new house and all that very soon.

For now you will have to be happy with just a hello :)

Friday, December 12, 2008

McK is too clever and too aware of hurting anyone's feelings......

Yesterday she asked when can she get a tattoo. Since I have 4 of my own, I can't very well tell her she can't get any. So I told her when she's 18 she can get ONE tattoo but it has to say "I love my Mom".

She says, but what about daddy. "I need to get one that says I love my Dad too".....

I say "No ways, you only getting one, so it has to be I love my Mom."...

She says...... "well in that case, I'll get only one, that says..... I love my Parents."

Isn't she cute!!!!

I had to bribe the child again this morning. It's the last day of school until 12 January 2009. I'm picking her up at 12:30 and taking her for ice cream.

My best friends are leaving on holiday on Sunday...... Boo hoo, sob sob, sniff sniff. I'm going to miss them terribly. 10 whole days without them.

Oh and I'm going MIA until next Wednesday! With the move and getting the internet up and running again, I'm not sure when I'll be on line again..............

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Anyone who tries to tell you to 'get a grip' will be quite surprised at your reaction -- maybe because there'll be so very much of it. Yes, you're what's commonly referred to as a loose cannon in the department of emotions these days. Better take a chaperone along.

How true how true..... ek is nie lekker nie.... But this too will pass!!!

I want 2008 over with. It's dragging on way too long!!!

On a brighter note. We received our family photo shoot pics this morning!! YAY!! I was a bit nervous opening them up, because I hate myself in photos. But I'm impressed. Love them. :) We so need to book a studio session with Robin. He is really really talented.


McK is bunking school today. Well it's holiday program so it's not like she is missing out on much. I had to fetch her early from school yesterday because she said she had a tummy ache. So I decided to keep her at home today. She thinks I'm the greatest mom in the world for allowing her to stay at Granny's.

We are going to get one last swim in, before my parents move house on Monday. I'm serving cocktails at noon, if anyone is interested in joining me??????

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

I'm here I'm here.....

Just in case any one is missing me :)

I'm alive and just barely kicking, but I'm around....

Will be back on line when I'm in a better mood......

Friday, December 5, 2008


Baby Angel Praying Pictures, Images and Photos

My prayers go out to the Muniz family this weekend.

I can't believe a year has passed since C-monster joined the angels up in Heaven.

I'm sure he is looking down over his baby sister and smiling!

My heart aches for you. I know no words can make the pain go away. Thank you for sharing him with us, in the short time he was here. He will always be loved and missed deeply.

I did not die
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die.

And also to 3 more angels,

Larissa Ewan Reilly

Ash, I never knew you a year ago when your babies were taken. But your story and heartache lives within me. I admire your strength hun. You and your family are in my thoughts at this time too.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Stop the world from spinning. Cease the waves from crashing. Hell tell the Sun to go shine some where else…..

I have a sick DH in the house……… Some one call 911.

Never mind the fact that I’ve been down with the flu for the entire week and still managed to work/cook/clean/watch the child………

I’m accepting all sympathy cards and flowers at my new home address.

I’m thinking of asking my sister’s Journalist Boyfriend so come do an article for the newspaper. First man to get sick and live to tell the tale.

(Thank goodness my DH doesn’t read my blog…… well I sure hope he doesn’t)

And he has been warned, that eye infection better clear up by Saturday. We have a family photo shoot scheduled!!!

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Spam Spam Spam

Wow, imagine how excited I get when I download email and I look at my inbox reading the following subject titles:

The happy friend in your pants will start moving again

Be a killer in bed anytime you feel like it

Supersize it - don't wait another minute

And of course you have to love all those urgent business proposals I get from deepest darkest Africa. Claiming that I've been especially chosen to help this poor poor family and in return have claim to $25000000... I'm so popular I've been "especially chosen" almost 20 times this week already.

I can give up my day job and just help these poor families....... I knew I had a calling in life.

Wow, what am I going to do with all the money? I'll make a deal, the first person to comment on my blog today...... I will buy them a house, any where in the world.... :)

The second person gets a car of their choice....

Do people actually fall for these dumb emails???

I can understand buying Viagra on line.... but come on, there is no ways you were especially chosen to help out this poor girl in Nigeria. Rather take your greedy hands and work on that Viagra issue.......

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Wow, my blog award!!!

I've always seen these out and about in the blogging world. So I'm very happy to announce that my blog got nominated by Megs.


Now it's my turn to give this award to five fabulous bloggers! So here they are:

I've followed Candi and Steven's quest for baby Carter since they got their BFP

Nancy's blog http://thenewlifeofnancy.blogspot.com/

TTC from a man's view, I love this blog http://xbox4nappyrash.blogspot.com/

One of the few blogs that aren't TTC related: http://loopyliz-loopyliz.blogspot.com/

And where would I be without the creator of mommy: Mrs B http://mortalmodels.blogspot.com/

My Fabulous Five Addictions:

1) My angel pie McKenna, who I live and breathe for

2) My TTC support system, who are now my good friends in all aspects of my life

3) My two best friends, M&H, who I love to heaven and back

4) POAS, come on you know I had to throw that in

5) To helping and supporting anyone wanting help with TTC

Here are the rules to receiving this award:

1. You have to pass it on to 5 other fabulous blogs in a post.

2. You have to list 5 of your fabulous addictions in the post.

3. You must copy and paste the rules and the instructions below in the post.Instructions: On your post of receiving this award, make sure you include the person that gave you the award and link it back to them. When you post your five winners, make sure you link them as well. To add the award to your post, simply right-click, save image, then "add image" it in your post as a picture so your winners can save it as well. To add it to your sidebar, add the "picture" gidget.Also, don't forget to let your winners know they won an award from you by emailing them or leaving a comment on their blog.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Sorry for being MIA.... It's been a rough weekend with the move. But we are all settled in now. Exhausted but at least the place looks good.

I have not had a good last 24 hours.....

DH is being a right old @ss since Friday. McK has been crying non stop for the last 12 hours. (Yes, straight through the night, in her sleep too). She wants to move back to Granny's house. Doesn't want to live with me. Cries hysterically.

Then she didn't want to go to school this morning. More crying. DH left at 5:30am this morning for a meeting in JHB. So I had to handle McK by myself. (which is maybe a good thing, cause last night all he could do was scream at her every time she cried for her granny).

Anyway, the only way I could get her to go to school is when she asked me if it was her birthday today. So I said yes, I was too tired to argue with her. So then she was happy to go to school because she turned 5 today. Oh and sometime during the day I need to go drop off party packs and a cake for her……. Yes, I feel bad for bribing her. But hey, she started it. I just played along.

On the way to school we stop at the cafe to get her cold drink for school. Try to get back into the car...... The flucking key (automatic button stupid central locking) won't open the car. I'm standing in the rain and wind...... Phone my dad to come help. I take his car and drop McK off at school. Without her school bag and school lunch....

I see her teacher and explain everything. Then I just burst into tears and haven't stopped sobbing since........

Please let this day get better. I probably won't be much on line this week either.

Oh, and I have flu to top it off with. And never mind the fact that I’m one day late……..

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Quick check in

So in between packing and cleaning, I managed to write another article for the mommy site.... Go check it out.... mommy

I can't wait for this move to be over with. You will have my undivided attention from then onwards..... maybe....

Monday, November 24, 2008

Check it out....

Ok, so instead of being entertained by my witty remarks today. I give you my sister's new music video. She is the lead singer of Scarlet Box. :) When the video starts she is the first character on screen.... ENJOY....

Friday, November 21, 2008

Bad bad bad

I'm been a very bad blogger... sorry.... I apologize to my adoring fans... LOL

I'm just in a state of limbo right now and don't really have anything to say. So much going on, and so little freaking time.

I leave you with this:

Things I Hate About Everyone

1.People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2.People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3.When people say 'Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too'. Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4.When people say 'it's always the last place you look'. Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their @sses!

5.When people say while watching a film 'did you see that?'. No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6.People who ask 'Can I ask you a question?'.... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7.When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8.When people say 'life is short'. What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9.When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks 'Has the bus come yet?'. If the bus came would I be standing here, dumb @ss?

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

It's Wednesday and I haven't blogged in a while. The world is going to come to a stand still..... maybe not..... LOL

I don't really have anything to say right now. Keeping all the good stuff for my side line project that I'm working on.

So for now you will have to be happy with the following tips that I received via email from a good friend:

To get rid of mosquitoes at night:
Keep leaves of mint near your bed or pillows and in around the room.

To remove ink from clothes:
Put toothpaste on the ink spots generously and let it dry completely, then wash.

To check freshness of fish:
Put it in a bowl of cold water. If the fish floats, it's fresh.

To boil potatoes quickly:
Skin one potato from one side only before boiling.

To avoid tears while cutting onions:
Chew gum.

To whiten white clothes
Soak white clothes in hot water with a slice of lemon for 10 minutes 10.

Ants Problem:
Keep the skin of cucumbers near the place or ant hole.

And that's all folks.... till next time.. BYE

Monday, November 17, 2008

Mommy Makeover......

Oooooohhhhhh, I love the new mommy look. Go check it out..... Mommy

Oh and spot the article written by yours truly. LOL ;-)

I'm starting to ease into panic mode. We have less than one month to find a new home and move. Please think of us and wish us well. We need it so badly, all the luck we can get.

Another very weird feeling for me is AVOIDING PREGNANCY. For the last 2 and a half years I've been doing everything possible to fall PG with no success. Now this cycle, we are doing everything possible to AVOID falling PG. Do you have any idea what kind of mind switch that is???

My ovaries are aching, my OPKs are positive. We are ready to O!! And we aren't doing a blady thing about it. Darn medical aid...... fluck it.......

Then I think, we have been doing this "hope to fall PG" thing for so long now, why all of the sudden would we fall PG now. Just carry on like usual. Don't avoid. Why would this cycle make any difference. Why would you fall PG this cycle??? I tell you why, cause that is the way my life works. Some one up there loves to play sick jokes on me. Some one believes I can handle all the stress and pressure. The one time when I don't want to be PG, I will be........ jinxing it, maybe..... But we are avoiding, so no chance of that.

Friday, November 14, 2008

When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.
Helen Keller

Just something to think about over the weekend!

Have a great one!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

To see a lion in your dream, symbolizes great strength, aggression and power. You will overcome your emotions and/or difficulties. As king of the jungle, the lion also represents royalty, leadership, pride and dominion. You have much influence over others. You may also need to exercise restraint in your own personal and social life.
To dream that you are attacked by a lion, indicates that you have many obstacles to overcome. You must resist the force that is driving you to self-destruction.

Last night I had the most terrifying dream. McK and myself were at my old Primary School, walking through the sports fields. As we turn a corner, there are lions every where. Mostly male lions, huge and on the prowl. I grab McK and we hide under this plastic cover. This one lion walks up to our hiding place and catches me looking at it.

He winks at me, yes a lion can wink. Well in my dream any way. Then he starts pretending to attack me. All the other lions, must have been about 20 of them take note of this and walk off to find other “targets”. So this lion actually saved me and McK from being attacked from the others. Then he calmly walked off. I just lay there sobbing and holding McK.

Why do I dream this sh*t……

I preferred my night before dream about taking 10 pregnancy tests……. All positive….. Mind you in my dream my mother took a test too.... positive....

Pregnancy Test
To dream that you are taking a pregnancy test, may be a metaphor for a new phase you are entering in your life (a new job, relationship, etc.) You may feel that you are being put to the test as to whether you are prepared or ready for these changes. Alternatively, this dream may be literal in meaning and address your anxieties/fears of getting pregnant.

Well one thing for sure is, that we are entering a new phase. Lets hope it will be less stressful and more happy than the last one.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

You won't be in the mood to work -- not at all -- and there's no reason to force yourself. Nothing except that small, inconsequential problem of where the money comes from.

That is so how I feel today. Actually felt like this the whole week already. I need to get some fire lit under my ……..

I’m way too lazy and unmotivated for my own good. And it has to change DRASTICALLY!!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008


Ok, I know I complained about the heat wave a few weeks ago.... but come on enough with the rain already. (and in case you haven't noticed, I'm not very creative with Titles..) LOL

It's been pouring down for almost 4 days non stop. I would be fine with it, if I was cuddled up in bed watching a movie and maybe a warm cheesy pizza or two. But I'm not. I'm sitting in front of my PC trying to work.

I'm in no mood to chat on line with my friends.. *blushes* Sorry girls. Just feeling blah..... and don't really have anything to say. Rather just pretend to miss me until I return.

I also just polished off a bowl of vanilla ice cream. Yummy, although I shouldn't be eating ice cream for brunch???

I'm starting to panic. We have to move house in January. No idea where to yet. But it's on the horizon. A whole new chapter is about to start for my little family as well as that of my parents. Exciting yet terrifying.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Brain dead today

Yup, and it ain't getting better...... I need sleep and sleep and maybe some more sleep.

DH's party was AWESOME. Except for the part when I accidentally flashed my left boob at my FIL and best friend. I was coming down the slip and slide very graciously. I didn't even realize it at first until I looked down. Of course my friend caught it on camera. And even though he has a "don't delete pics off my camera" policy, I deleted it. :)

The rest of the party was great fun. A few of us ended up in the jacuzzi and throwing jelly around in down anything. Do you know how cold jelly is when you are sitting in a warm jacuzzi??? Shame poor DH, didn't get to join on the fun because we were too busy ordering him around.... **Blushes** Don't worry I will make it up to him later today.

And with that, I say HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE!!! Hope you have a great day and get to leave early.

We have a few new stress issues in the pipeline. Will give out more details over the next few weeks. One of which is that TTC is off the cards till January next year, maybe even as late as March.

Have a wonderful week where ever you are......

Friday, November 7, 2008

9 November 2002


6 years ago I became Mrs. Murray.

Babe, we all know it hasn’t been an easy ride. We have had our fair share of ups and downs. But we have always made it work. I hope the next 6 years are a lot less bumpy. :-)






I love you, and always will.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008


My mind is entertaining two thoughts…. And I can’t decide which of the two relates to how I feel….

1) Do I have faith that we will one day have another child?

2) Or do I just hope that one day we will have another child???

“Faith is believing in things that common sense tells you not too.”

Common sense tells me our TTC journey is far from over, maybe it will never be over. My common sense tells me not to set my heart on having another child. So do I have faith then that we will????? I don’t know…. I don’t think I have faith….

Do I hope???

Yes, I hope with all my heart and soul that we do. One day……

I think my hope is greater than my faith.

I don’t have much faith at the moment. I have a lot of hope.

But do I need faith in order to hope????

Have I confused the cr@p out of any of you, as I have just myself???? LOL

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

A beautiful day......

Happy Pictures, Images and Photos

I got a text message from a very good friend this morning. With such wonderful news!!! Her long awaited BFP has finally made it’s appearance!!! YAY!!! I’m so thrilled for her!!

Girl, wishing you an AWESOME pregnancy!!!

In other news.... The wicked witch from the uterus flew in late last night. Making her presence known for the 33rd time since we ditched the BCP…..

Monday, November 3, 2008

My baby

Well, my little girl. Since she isn't really a baby any more....


I'm still waiting for DH to download some latest pics of her. But this one will have to do for now. Isn't she gorgeous??

And she just proved to me yesterday that she is indeed a wonderful child. So well mannered and polite. We were treated to an outing at the Movies with my aunt and her 2 grand kids. McK was in her element and giggled all the way through. I have such an awesome child. She said her thank yous and pleases. And just over all well behaved. I couldn't have been prouder of her.

Except of course when it was time to say good bye to her "cousins". She had a little melt down with loads of tears. But I think she was just over tired from the days excitement. Poor thing.

We are having a heat wave at the moment, 36 degrees Celsius. It's freaking hot, wish there was a way to move my note book to the swimming pool. I'm sure I'll get way more work done, sitting in the pool typing with one hand, while the other hand holds my ice cold Vodka Martini?? (ok, any cocktail, Martini was just easier to spell.LOL)

I seriously can not believe this year has only two months left. It's almost DH and my wedding anniversary (9th Nov) and DH's bday (10 Nov). We have one big party planned for Sunday (9th). So looking forward to it!! We having a picnic lunch with close friends and family.

I'm still having IPS..... not fun, it's annoying!!! Just trying to ignore them best I can. ;-)

Friday, October 31, 2008

Where can I get it????


I need to find the supplier of this water…. LOL

It’s probably been sold in dark alley’s around the world. Or are women cutting off their left pinky finger for it???……. Because there are so many BFPs popping up all over the place, the secret has to be in the water, right??!!!! I’m going to start requesting pics of hands before I see pics of BFPs!!!

I just need a few bottles, I’m not even going to use it for myself. I’m going to give it as Christmas presents to my TTC friends. PROMISE!!!

Ok, and before some of you go googling for kirkland fertility water, the pic is a fake.... I photobucketed it, just some humour for a Friday.

happy halloween Pictures, Images and Photos

To all celebrating!!! :)

Thursday, October 30, 2008

I’m not perfect.......
But parts of me are pretty awesome.

So which parts you ask…. Well to name a few….

My mommy part:

I am an awesome mother. Yes, there are times where I fail but which mother doesn’t. My child is happy and loved to heaven and back. Isn’t that the most important thing? I’ve brought up the most adorable girlie. She is my biggest achievement in life.

My wife part:

I believe I’m an awesome wife. Maybe a bit bossy, but overall a good wife. I’ve stood beside and believed in him. And even though I get tested now and then, there is no denying you won’t find a better wife than me for my DH.

My sister part:

This is a tough one, because some times I suck as a sister but not without good reason. I try my best! And I do worry about what you are doing or not doing.

My daughter part:

I’m the sensitive daughter. I take on a lot of the emotions, and try to be brave. When my parents hurt, I hurt. When they are sad, I’m sad. When they are happy, I’m overjoyed. Hey, and I gave them a beautiful Grand daughter, so already there I score big points in this department.

My friend part:

I will go to the ends of the earth to make sure you are happy!!! I don’t think you will find a more supportive person than me. Day or night, I think I’m an awesome friend to have!!!

It feels weird writing things about myself in this manner, yes the 100 things in a previous post are also about me. But this is different. I need to get used to seeing the wonderful things about me and then admitting to it. Going to take some getting used to….. so….

I’m going to change the subject now….. (still about me though)…. I’m 8dpo today. And even though I know there is absolutely no chance what so ever that we could be PG at this moment. It’s still nice to hang onto hope….. (yip, there is that word again.) So much for not knowing where I am in my cycle hey.... old habits die hard, ok???

Wednesday, October 29, 2008


Definition of hope

Hope is a belief in a positive outcome related to events and circumstances in one's life. Hope implies a certain amount of perseverance — i.e., believing that a positive outcome is possible even when there is some evidence to the contrary.

This post is for my friend, H…


What I hope for is happy.
What I hope for is love.
What I hope for is peace.
What I hope for is that hope itself is not lost.
Many people give upon hope,
Never going for more.
Never putting it on line and hope that everything will alright.
Hope is that what make sorrow go away.
Hope is kingdom were build on it,
Hope that greatness would come pass.
What I hope for is happy
I hope for is love
I hope for a life of peace
I hope that hope itself never gets lost.

By Jody Johnson

Another friend (D) reminded me this morning (yeah, I have loads of friends) that God has already laid out the plan of how things must work out. You just have to grin and bare the wait.

I guess we just have to HOPE that it works out the way we want it too.

I’m praying for you my friend, I pray that HOPE turns into a reality!!!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

I would die for that....

I was going through some forum chats this morning. Just lurking around and came across a You Tube video……. Needless to say I was in tears mid way.

I dedicate this to my very good friends M&H, and of course my TTC friends who have over come the struggle and those that are still faced with it…..

Monday, October 27, 2008

Can't keep my eyes open

And it’s Monday morning 8:05am, I’m so ready to climb back into bed and sleep for another few hours.

What a weekend!!!

Friday night we had some drinks with M&H. Although we did have an early night, since we knew Saturday was going to be hectic.

Saturday morning we had McK’s Pre-School Awards morning. It was so cute. I had to fight back the tears for an hour. Don’t have a clue why I was so emotional about the whole event. McK was an Angel in the nativity play. Such a sweety, she played her part in all cuteness, (well post photos later). I was just worried that she might pick her nose on stage, but she didn’t. McK also got given a Book Prize for “Co-operation”. I was so proud!!

Saturday afternoon, we couldn’t get to M&H’s house fast enough. Left McK with granny and off we were for our “Music in the Park” picnic. We tried to stay positive about the approaching grey thundering clouds….. but unfortunately the rain came pouring down as we got to the venue. We grabbed our picnic baskets and everyone headed into the building for the picnic instead.

After an hour the rain calmed down to a cool drizzle. We managed to find a nice spot right in front of the stage. Two of the bands finished their sets. Electric Muse, they are a 4 part (all female) band. It was awesome. Then Afro Jazz took the stage. We were all waiting patiently for Prime Circle to start. Of course we all rushed to the front of the stage when they did.

Not even into the second song, the rain came belting down again. We were soaked. But determined to stand there and dance and sing. Unfortunately they had to cut it short after just the third song. Their equipment was already under water. It was wonderful….. and cold……

Sunday I spent the day playing with McK while DH worked. She found some of my old HPTs…. (yes, it takes me a while to throw them away.) And her inquisitive mind asked me what they are used for. So without going into too much detail I quickly explained the one line (no baby) two lines (baby) story to her. And then she said, maybe you will get two lines soon….. bless her heart. Imagine the story she is telling her Preschool friends today……..

Thursday, October 23, 2008

So I’m going through my sister’s cupboard to find an outfit for Saturday eve. We have been invited to attend a work function of my friends. It’s a picnic with Prime Circle.

Only difference between me and my sis… well she’s a 24 year old Rock star, and I’m a 28 year old mommy….. with a bit of pizzazz….. Must say I’m quite impressed that half of the stuff actually fits. But the real sexy stuff is a tad too small. And I don’t think DH would let me go out in it…. LOL

I’m just hoping the weather plays along for Sat. We have McK’s award function at school on Sat morning and then the picnic late afternoon/early eve. My friend says if it rains, then we dance in the rain…. Note to self, don’t wear white!!!!

I cheated and looked what CD I’m was on yesterday…… weird though, cause I would never have guessed I was right smack bang on O date. But without any signs of O… do you think because I put TTC out of my mind my body decided to hell with you, you just wont O then??? LOL

Anyway, I don’t really have anything else interesting to say…….

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Life is too short to wake up with regrets.
So love the people who treat you right.
Forget about the ones who don't.
Believe everything happens for a reason.
If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands.
If it changes your life, let it.
Nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.
Wise words that I received today. :)

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Your energy today is perfect for physical exercise of any kind, from walking an extra block to running a marathon. Don't overdo it, of course, but expect a little boost just when you need it most.

And would you believe I actually got on the treadmill again this morning. And in a much better mood than yesterday. (I didn't blog yesterday, for the simple reason that it would just have been a down right negative depressing post.)

Then just as I got off the treadmill, I received a very cool phone call. One of my friends is PG. She got her BFP this morning, and confirmed it with positive bloods!! YAY!! It's so awesome. I knew it would happen for you girl! Now you get that almost still winter maternity leave!!!! :) You lucky fish!

It's also my brothers birthday today. 20 years old. My parents no longer have any teenagers living under their roof. LOL

Friday, October 17, 2008


Yes this is my 100th post as a blogger. I noticed some fellow bloggers do something special. So I’ve stolen this idea….

Here are 100 things about me which you may already know or not. In no particular order:

1 I have 4 tattoo's
2 I have a nose ring
3 I have a fear of frogs
4 I hate telephones
5 My favourite colour is Blue
6 My favourite alcoholic drink is Amstel
7 Although white wine comes a close second
8 I smoke the odd cig now and then
9 I have 2 brothers
10 I have 1 sister
11 I'm the oldest child
12 I cry easily
13 I love reading blogs
14 I love my SOP girls and my Lucky Ladies!!
15 I love my Mommy friends too
16 I have been married for almost 6 years
17 I have blue eyes
18 I have short blonde hi lighted hair
19 I'm about 173cm tall
20 I wear my slippers most of the day
21 I work from home
22 I hate driving
23 I have 2 best friends, Mathi and Hanlie which I share everything with
24 I got engaged the day before my 21st Birthday
25 Got married the day before my DH's birthday
26 I knew my DH 3 weeks before we moved in together
27 and 4 months before we got engaged
28 I love the rain, but not for days on end. A good shower is lovely.
29 I miss peanut butter cups
30 I did au pair work in Maryland, USA for a year
31 I've been to Disney World
32 I've also been to 26 of the 50 States in the USA
33 My favourite band of all time is "Texas"
34 Favourite song of all time is "In demand" by Texas
35 I've had the hardest year of my life this year so far
36 I'm blessed with the most awesome daughter!!!
37 I'm not a dog or cat person
38 I'm a fish person, we have a tank filled with Malawi Fish.
39 I want my best friends to become parents one day
40 My favourite ice cream is anything vanilla
41 I love Strawberry Milkshakes
42 I want another baby
43 I never used to leave the house without make up, these days (months) I could care less
44 I wish I had a cupboard full of lingerie
45 I prefer hotels to camping
46 I love reading books
47 I'm trying real hard to write my own book
48 I once used "recreational" drugs, many many years ago.
49 I stole my DH from his girlfriend at the time :)
50 I'm addicted to HPT/OPKs
51 My favourite show at the moment is Army Wives
52 I hate shaving my legs
53 I love perfume, really wish I could afford more/different types
54 I refuse to pick up dog poo
55 I love making McK laugh
56 I love my DH, even though he messes up from time to time
57 I used to bite my nails
58 I love sleeping late on the weekends
59 I'm grateful my DH lets me sleep late on the weekends :)
60 I used to be a Coke addict….. Coke a cola that is….. Not the white stuff silly
61 I still kiss my dad good night
62 My original engagement and wedding ring was stolen :(
63 I want to live on a tropical island
64 I can't do a hand stand
65 I struggle to swallow big tablets/pills
66 I would like to think I'm very creative
67 I usually (almost always) want things done my way
68 I hate confrontation
69 I'm afraid of what people think of me
70 I wish I could be a photographer, and take awesome pics.
71 I seldom go to the shops alone, someone has to be with me.
72 I don't eat seafood, except for Calamari
73 My favourite day of the year is 31 December!
74 I hate celebrating my birthday
75 I wish I was more brave
76 I have the weirdest dreams ever, no one can beat mine
77 My favourite Author is Nora Roberts and Marian Keys
78 I hate it when those popcorn bits get stuck at the back of my throat
79 My cousin and sister say I have no tact, I don't believe them
80 I hate Christmas beetles, you know those brown beetles that always end up in your hair?
81 I wish I had R10 for every time someone told me to "relax it will happen".
82 I love watching Make Over shows, whether it's houses or people, I always cry at the reveal
83 I hate doing dishes!!! I detest it, but will if I absolutely have to…..
84 I don't have much patience with anything
85 I hate unfriendly service, especially at the grocery store!!
86 I get jealous over other peoples BFPs
87 I have my own business, Making Babies.
88 Geography was my best subject at school
89 And I sucked at Maths
90 I love candy floss/cotton candy
91 I can't wait for the day to end, then I can go pick my angel up from school
92 I have a best friend who I have never met in person, only via the internet. Who strangely enough lives a street away from my Uncle!
93 I love my Dad's home made hamburgers!!
94 I eat my steak med to rare
95 No matter how much I love my pet Fish, I will NOT put my hand in their water/tank…. GROSS
96 I've only recently, like the last 2 weeks, started making our bed every morning. Before that, WTH who makes beds up???
97 I hate thinking of the "what if's" I can drive myself crazy. .
98 I’m hoping that by the end of the year, all our debt will be paid off.
99 I would love to receive more comments on my blog, even if it's just a hello. I know how many people read every day… would just like to know who??
100 And finally, I am thankful that each day I get to help someone whether it's just a shoulder to cry on or to take their frustrations out on.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

I'm feeling lost.....

Lost in everything and in any possible way. I don’t know what it is or how to describe it.

I’m feeling sorry for myself too. Why can’t it be me????? Why can’t it be me for so many different reasons….BLAH, it’s not fair…… I know I shouldn’t be PG right now, it wouldn’t work right now…. But then again, so many other people that shouldn’t be right now, ARE!!!! What makes me different….. BLAH…..

Also I’m having withdrawal symptoms from not seeing our best friends. It’s not normal to go 6 days without seeing them, or speaking to them over the phone/email/msn. It’s hard. It feels as if I’m missing my left arm or something. Why do people have to be busy?? That isn’t a good enough excuse!!!!! LOL Ok, I’m being selfish. But I miss them. And you are all going, “come on it’s only been 6 days????” Just shows you how much we love them and need them to be a part of our everyday lives. Please let Monday come soon!!!!!

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Update of Mck’s Skin

In case anyone was wondering……

I started bathing her in Tea Tree Oil last week, and using Sudacrem cream on her legs/arms. What a difference it has made. Plus I started giving her an Antihistamine yesterday which will help with the itching. It also has a “sedative” effect, says so on the bottle. Guess who got a good nights sleep last night????? ;-)

You know summer isn’t even here and it’s already so hot. Does anyone know of a rain dance we could do?? Come on Kelley, send your girls over here. I’m sure they can help???? I’m sure they would love a trip to Africa!

Oh and today is finally Wednesday, Hump day…. Not that there is any humping going on here. LOL

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

You feel the urge to go for some new big goal -- and should find that it's closer to your grasp than you would have thought! You can achieve far more than anyone realizes when you focus your ambition.

And I do have a new goal!!! I want to loose 6kg. It’s not a lot, but it’s a start. Once I’ve lost those 6, then we will work on the next 5kg. This is something I really need to do for myself. I need to put as much effort into losing weight as I did into TTC.

I know I can do this!

Monday, October 13, 2008

Only 12 Mondays left.....

Of 2008.

Scary stuff.

I had the weirdest day yesterday. Felt completely at ease. I sat watching McK playing and smiling and laughing. And I thought, it’s ok. I’m ok with having just McK in my life. I’m the luckiest person in the entire world to be blessed with this angel. She makes me smile and laugh and fills my heart, body and soul with so much love. Do I really need to have another child? When the one I have is so perfect? It’s almost as if the desperation to have another one just left my body, and I’m ok.

I even said to McK that I'm so happy to have her, and just her. She turned around and said to me "yes, but I need a brother and a sister." Maybe one day my darling......

This doesn’t mean we aren’t going to TTC any more. I would love to have another baby. But for now, I’m at peace with sharing my life with my angel pie. I need to focus on her for a bit.

Does this make any sense at all???

On Making Babies news:

The Making Babies Social Network is running an October competition. The winner will get a Pack of 5 HPTs. You will just need to register.

Friday, October 10, 2008

A full year of hard work has helped you to achieve a personally fulfilling goal. Chances are good that you're surrounded by fans and media now, but as soon as you can fit it in, start thinking about a title for the how-to book you'll feel eminently qualified to pen.

No ways…. :)

Would you believe I’ve been nagged to write a book now for quite some time now. Maybe I should attempt it??

My grandfather just published his book, and apparently there are 2 more on the way. I read Canaan North in 3 days. Wow, was I impressed. Never did it cross my mind that my grandfather would be so good at writing. I really enjoyed the book, although the “love scenes” freaked me out a bit, I mean hello this is my Grandfather’s imagination running wild here……

I’ve been really domesticated this week. Cooking dinner every night, getting my mothers dogs sorted out and happy. Doing dishes, yes me, I did freaking dishes…… I’m actually going to attempt to do housework today too. You know sweep and mop floors. **GASP** It’s a bugger being alone at home. You end up doing all these crazy things during the day just to pass the time.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

The Red Witch......

Yes, she flew in at 5:52am this morning……..

At least I know the supplements I’m taking are working. They are supposed to give you a perfect cycle. 28 days, O on CD14, 14 day LP…. I got all that. But they promised me a BFP too…..

And yes I’m still keeping quiet about what supplements I’m on. Since I’m not going to share it with anyone and then they go and get a BFP. I want to be the first BFP, then I’ll share…. Selfish? No I don’t think so. I want to keep something TTC related to myself. I’m always sharing and helping where I can. So just this one thing, I want all to myself….. for now…..

McK had a much better start to her day today. No screaming or crying. Shame, I think yesterday she was just a bit emotional.

I need to seriously do some work today, since I’ve been slacking off the last two days. But I just can’t get cracking. I’ll rather walk up and down the passage, stare out the windows, maybe attempt the kitchen…. Work just doesn’t feel right today. Wonder if there are any good movies on????

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Not the best start to the morning

Everything was going just fine. We were all up at 5:30am. Even McK was chirpier than the birds outside. But then at 7:15am, my child changed into a Pro Wrestler…….

It started as we were walking out the door, on our way to school. The tears started falling, the screaming started, and she clung to my neck for dear life. Then I had to try and get her in the car. Some smart maneuvering from mommy and she was in, safety buckled and everything… turn my back and she is out. Not just out of her safety belt. But out of the car!!! She ran to the garage door and grabbed the handle. Would you believe it took me, a grown 28 year old woman, a good 7 minutes to get a 4 year old’s hands loose from the door knob.

And where was daddy during this….. Sitting in the car watching………

More clinging and grabbing and screaming. Back in her safety belt. I could hear her shouting to daddy saying “I want to talk to mommy”. I dared not open the door because I knew she would bolt. Instead daddy opened the window just slightly so that I could hear.

I looked at her face, she looked at me. I started sobbing, she started sobbing. I opened the door, gave her a big hug. She sobbed some more, I sobbed some more. Promised her I would pick her up from school in 10 minutes.

I sobbed all the way back into the house, she sobbed all the way to school. Worst is, she thinks I’m picking her up in 10 minutes and that was an hour and a half ago.

No one said parenting was going to be easy………………

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

All by myself
Don't wanna be

All by myself

I’m all alone this week…. I don’t do “alone” very well. This house is empty, this office is empty. It’s horrible and I’ve only been “alone” for about an hour now. How am I going to make it through till Friday? Yes, DH is here but he is at work till 6pm everyday. I pick McK up at 4pm. But still this office/house is dead quiet.

My parents, brother and sister have gone diving in Mozambique. Nice island style holiday, and here I sit in front of the PC. I’m going to attempt to do some work. But will most likely spend most of the day sorting things out. Maybe do some personal filing. Maybe just lie next to the pool all day…. LOL

Monday, October 6, 2008

We had such a great weekend. Especially yesterday. We decided in the end not to go to the Sexpo. Instead, we went over to our friends for a BBQ. Which ended up back at our place, in the swimming pool. Now it might be hot already weather wise, but it certainly isn’t swimming weather yet. I guess those few beers really do make you brave. If McK joined in and shivered her way through a game of Water volley ball.

School started back up again today. The 4th term, (and final term of the year). McK did not want to go this morning, so I had to bribe her with another swim session for when she gets home. I’m just not so sure that I’ll be joining her though. I’ll sit on the side and just watch.

My child’s skin is terrible again. I don’t know what to do about her eczema. Poor thing is scratching like mad, and when I do put normal (well actually any) aqueous cream on her, it burns her. I’ve tried the medicated creams too, but nothing wants to ease the itching or the red inflamed patches. I feel so sorry for her. Anyone have any advice?????

I’m nearing the end of Cycle 31. I thought I saw some spotting early this morning. But not really much, just when I went to the loo. It’s gone now, or should I say it will be back just now when I start getting a little excited about not having it. Especially since I’m 12dpo already. Even though I know there is very little chance of a BFP, my inner TTC Diva still holds on to that hope of a miracle. I’ve contemplated testing yesterday morning, and today. But I resisted both times. Even after Peeing in a cup. I stopped every time before ripping off the wrapper and dipping the test. I quietly told myself to stop, and throw the p out….. this way I haven’t wasted 2 tests. I need a gold star!!!!

I just noticed my ticker..... it says 1 day till testing LOL

Friday, October 3, 2008

That hint of irritability you're feeling doesn't have to take over your entire day -- but it might, if you don't get rid of it. How? Exercise, darling, exercise. You'll work out your frustrations and do something special for the person who shares your life -- and the effects of your moods.

How true, except I don’t like the “exercise” part. It’s Friday, you aren’t supposed to exercise on a Friday.

Today is going to be an awesome day, I’m going to try and make it an awesome day. Not going to let anything stand in my way. Isn’t that a line from a song??

We have no real plans for the weekend. Although we are considering going to SEXPO on Sunday. I keep changing my mind about going. I also keep hearing conflicting opinions from people/friends that went yesterday. I guess we will just play it by ear.

I should be about 9dpo today. And even though I did end up testing late yesterday afternoon (BFN), but only because of peer pressure…. You know who you are… I’m really not convinced like other friends that we could actually have a BFP cycle. I mean hello, for the last 2 and a bit years, we have been timing BD to a tee. Why the one cycle where we avoid O date, would we get a BFP. Yeah I know the whole fertile window thing, and so what if we BD 2 days before and the day after O. Why on earth would that make any difference. Besides we weren’t actively TTC this month. I might even consider taking a break next cycle too. It’s been lovely not obsessing too much.

And with that said, I will report one IPS(imaginary pregnancy syndrome). For the last 3 days it feels like my uterus is stretching. I’ve never felt this before, but it’s weird. It’s like a pulling and tugging feeling, and some cramps. This is the last I talk about IPS.

It’s now time to go take that jog around the block…….

Thursday, October 2, 2008

I’ve started this blog post 4 times today…. And each time I read through it, I just know I’m going to piss someone off…. So maybe it’s better left unsaid. So back space and say:

I hope the day I get my BFP, (when ever that may be) that I don’t forget my TTC struggle, that I don’t forget my friends are still struggling. That I listen when they say, “please enough with the PG talk”. That I don’t get offended. Because not so long ago, we were all in the TTC boat. Some are just luckier than others, that they got to move on up to the PG Cruise liner. And it’s ok, because I know there is a seat for me. I’m just taking my sweet ass time getting there.

Hell, the last few posts have sure been “doom and gloom” posts hey. Don’t worry my meds will kick in soon, and I’ll start talking about Candy Sugar Mountain……. :)

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Wow, 30 September already. I hate that this year is coming to an end. It’s way too fast. There is still so much to do this year. I was supposed to be at least 8 month PG by now….. If everything went according to plan… Mind you if everything went according to plan. We could have had 3 babies by now already. LOL

It’s such a gorgeous day today, we shouldn’t be stuck in offices. We shouldn’t be working, we should be out playing and running around. Trying to be carefree. I think I need a good dose of “care free” in order to get myself out of this rut.

DH is running a golf day tomorrow. I’m still undecided whether to go with or not. My idea of being outside, it not to work. So if I do go with, I will end up working. Naah, we’ll see….

Anyone care for a TTC update… or should I say non TTC update… I have a friend, (you know who you are) that is optimistic for this cycle of ours. We are cycle buddies this time round. Girl, I’m hoping the supplements do the trick for you. I don’t mind giving you all my baby dust. I think you anyway got much more chance than what I do. I just can’t believe you are going to wait till 12dpo to test. That is insane!!!!!

Yesterday, I was quite touched by something another good friend said to me. He said “he was sad for us, that we hadn’t got our BFP yet”. You have no idea what that means to me. Just that one sentence. It’s one of the very view times that he has voiced his opinion about us TTC. Not going to go into details, but it really meant a lot to me.

Monday, September 29, 2008

I don't understand.....

Why when things start to go wrong, it gets a lot worse before it even starts to get better.

I’m so sad today. I spent most of the morning in tears, both silent and sobbing. It’s not fair. I didn’t do anything wrong, well at least I don’t think I did anything wrong. I’ve always been the one to support any decision made. I’ve fought the same wars as you. I am on your side. Yet today, I’m the one being ignored. I don’t like this. I hate it. I don’t need this right now in my life either. I don’t have the energy for it.

One good thing that happened today…. My cousin find out she is 5 weeks PG!!! I’m so thrilled for her and her hubby!! I just had this feeling when I saw her over the weekend, I even gave her a HPT. She said the lines came up within seconds!!! They have too been having problems with TTC, and the docs gave them IVF treatment as the only option to fall PG. They were just about to start the whole process, but just waiting around for AF. Ha ha, guess they won’t be seeing her for another good 10 months or so!

Thursday, September 25, 2008

The good fortune fairy

I really need her to come pay us a visit. REALLY!!! We really need our luck to turn around. I guess it doesn’t really help to complain. Complaining doesn’t solve the problem. But please give us a break.

I feel like sitting in a corner and balling my eyes out. Why a corner, I don’t know. But maybe a hole is too much effort to dig out.

Today feels so weird. With yesterday’s public holiday, today feels like a Monday. I hate it. It’s so messed up. I keep having to remind myself that it is Thursday today. At least tomorrow is Friday. YAY, not that it makes a big difference really.

We are keeping McK at home this week. I think she might have German Measles. She started off with some spotting/rash on Tuesday. It hasn’t really cleared up. Neither has it gotten any worse. She also doesn’t have the classic symptoms of GM. So I’m not sure what is up with her, I know it’s been doing the rounds at school. Rather keep her home and rested I guess.

Other than that, nothing much going on.

I’m a tad sensitive to pregnant talk today too. I don’t want to hear about morning sickness or cravings or anything PG related…. It will be better tomorrow. No offense meant to anyone…. Today is just an “off day”. Guess we are allowed to have them.

Let me rather get going, I’m just rambling on…… bye…..

Oh, and remember the Spring Time Competition is closing tomorrow. Make sure you enter!!!

Monday, September 22, 2008

Another Monday!

I’ve been sitting here thinking about what to blog about today. I didn’t want to bore you with another star sign. So what else can I chat about??

I must say, I’m sure they (being the Government) are putting something in our water. Do you know how many BFPs there have been in the last 2 weeks here in South Africa? It’s amazing. Just about every second day I’m hearing the good news from online friends and clients.

I’m really rooting for one very important BFP. Annie, you girl… I still haven’t checked your chart. I’m too nervous. I don’t want to see anything but a BFP on there. I know…. But surely it isn’t too much to ask of you.

As far as our TTC project. Yeah, I’ve changed it from journey to project. Well I don’t really know. It’s sort of on hold, you know that whole not trying not preventing. I’m still taking all the supplements that I should be taking. You know, all part of Mission KU. I figured, I bought the stuff, I might as well drink it. So if it happens, it happens. I’m not too phased about it to be quite honest.

My life seems to be back on track again. I never want last week over again. What a nightmare, and no I decided I’m not going to dish the details. Rather be grateful I’m back to my normal self, than dwell on what happened.

On a side note:

Just a reminder that the Spring TTC competition closes on 26 September, so make sure you enter your poem before then.

You could stand the chance to win a HPT & OPK combo pack!

Plenty of Baby Dust!!

Friday, September 19, 2008

If you're not 'supposed' to do it, if you're not supposed to like it and most definitely if it's something you've been told to never, ever even think about -- well, you're probably on your way right now to giving it a shot. And you'll enjoy it, too.

Sounds exciting enough.... except I have no plans for the weekend. Maybe I'll be surprised!

I don't want anyone worrying about me, I'm ok..... I'll be ok......

Today is looking a little brighter. And I'm sure everything will sort itself out. It always does.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

I’m going all Cryptic on you….

Life seems to be throwing me a curve ball(s) again. It happens often… It’s never the straight and narrow with me. It’s always one thing after the other.

They say God doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle. Well the big man up there must think I’m a freaking gladiator.

I can’t go airing everything here, yet….. I’m still trying to work it all out in my mind.

I often find myself coming to a fork in the road. I always chose to take the left path. I wonder when I will start realizing that maybe going to the right would be better?

The only thing that makes sense to me right now is to put TTC on hold for a bit. Maybe indefinitely. We’ll see…..

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Is today any better?

Well sort of.

I hate fighting. I hate disappointment. I hate feeling negative and down. But it will blow over. It always does. I always come out breathing on the other side. This time is no different.

I watched Army Wives last night, (like I do every Monday night.) And there was a bible verse that was shown:

1 Corinthians 13:13
"Now abideth faith, hope, love,

but the greatest of these is love."

I guess at the end of the day, I always have faith and hope. But love always wins the fight.

He can be lucky I love him.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Life is not fair.......

It’s been a rough past 3 days for me personally.

But never mind the crap I’m having to put up with.

My good friend G, is having a D&C this morning. I’m so very upset for her and T. It’s not fair. To wait so long to have your beanie, and then have it taken away. I’m so mad with everything. We prayed so hard.

Why does TTC have to be so difficult. Why do the "16 year old drunk weed smoking girls" go on to have healthy pregnancies. I just don’t get it!!!!!!

Another friend of mine also lost their baby over the weekend. We were so excited on Friday. L, I know you are reading. I just want to say I’m so sorry you had to go through this. You are in my thoughts.


G had this beautiful poem as part of her sig, and I would like to share it here:

An angel held the book of life
wrote down your babies birth
whispered as she closed the book
too beautiful for earth...
Author - Unknown

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Mission Impossible...

**yes, insert music sound track right about now**

I’ve got a new POA for cycle 31. A new secret mission to get us knocked up.

Unfortunately I’m not sharing any details.

All will be revealed when we get our BFP. Notice I said “when”….

Mission KU will start as soon as the witch arrives…….

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

The witch heard me, and she is nearing in for the kill....... circling circling.....

I swear I have a bulls eye painted on my uterus.....

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

So far.... so good...12dpo.... no spotting... but don't let the witch hear me....

I must say one thing that is annoying me about blogging so early in the morning, is that the date/time stamp is wrong!!!! Does anyone know if you can set it to your local time.... I just know this post is going to say Monday, but it's actually Tuesday already.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Good morning one and all…

I trust you all had a good weekend. Ours was just fab. Got some much needed rest and got McK’s room sorted out. You can now see the floor again and not trip over anything.

We are ignoring the BFN I got yesterday. Not talking about it.

Big NEWS!!! McK learnt how to blow her nose!! DH and I are so very proud. We have been trying to teach her to blow her nose for the last 2 years, and eventually on Saturday she did. I was sitting in the bath, she walked in. Took the toilet paper, folded it over and over and blew!! I promise you, I almost jumped out the bath to hug her. I called for DH and we all 3 gave “hi fives”. It was so cool. Kind of reminded me of the day when McK jumped for the first time. (yip, both feet off the ground). It’s the little things that make parenting so AWESOME!!

I’m getting quite excited for some of my TTCing friends. I really hope there are some BFPs soon.

Friday, September 5, 2008

That uncomfortable, edgy feeling you've been dealing with isn't going anywhere just yet -- not until you do something about it. It's time to figure out what's been keeping you up and pacing the floor at all hours. Face it, solve it and move on. You're ready. Now take aim and fire!

I hate that feeling. It usually means bad news. I've had it since last friday..... And it only got worse today, and even worse when I read my star sign..... aai....

I'm just looking out for that fan....

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

On Monday we learnt that an ex-colleague had passed away over the weekend. He was such a vibrant funny guy. I feel sad for his family that has to bear the pain of not having him around any more. I can see by his Face Book wall, that he was much loved by all his friends. May you rest in peace W.C!!

The bank flucked us over too this week. But DH is handling it. I’m not going to get into details, it just makes my blood boil.

McK was home from school yesterday. She cried bitterly yesterday morning while I was trying to dress her. Said she was feeling sick. I admit she has a bad cough and looks as if she might have some sinus issues. But I think she was ok to go to school. But 20 minutes of tears and pulling at heart strings made me keep her at home. The rule was that she had to stay on the couch watching TV/Movies the whole day. Because staying at home is NOT supposed to be fun. No running around with the dogs or playing outside. By last night she seemed much better.

Until this morning. Big crocodile tears again. Sobbing that she didn’t want to go to school. Now my child has been in school since she was 15 months old. She has never had a problem going to school. So after a few more tears and lip quivering, I convinced her to tell me what is going on…..

It seems the Grade 1’s are being mean to her. I think its harmless teasing from their side, but my poor child is heart broken and doesn’t want to go to school because of this. Eventually I convinced her that she needed to go to school and if the Gr 1’s start with her, she must go tell a teacher. I also gave her some vitamins, and told her it will make her big and strong. Then the Gr 1’s will be scared of her. She loved this. Kept flexing her muscles all the way to school. Oh, and I told her that she wasn’t 4 years old anymore, but rather 4.5 years old. Her face lit up, saying “I’m almost as big as those Gr 1’s”.

By the time we got to school, she was A-Ok. I didn’t even have to walk her in to her class. She kissed me at the gate and skipped in.

Now I will be honest with you. When I saw her crying this morning and telling me her story. The first thing that went through my mind was to march into that school and have her point out those nasty kids. I had images of burrowing their heads in the sand pit and giving them a good kick up the @ss. Don’t upset my child!!!!! But then realized that this is school. Kids tease each other. And they will pick on the little ones. I will draw the line if anyone physically hurts her. I will however just get DH to talk to the teacher tomorrow morning about it.

On the TTC front. Not much happening. 6dpo heading into the 1ww. Thinking about testing over the weekend. Trying not to stress too much. Hoping for a miracle. You know, the usual shit. :)

Monday, September 1, 2008

Spring is here...

Happy 1st September!! May Spring bring loads of BFPs!!

I decided to launch a competition on the "Making Babies Social Network".

Only members are allowed to enter, so if you haven't registered yet... please do so. :)

Sunday, August 31, 2008

What a weekend we had…….

Started off Friday night with a friend’s “House Farewell” party. The theme was “From the History Books”. Must say there were some very good costumes. But my favourite was my brother’s Elvis suit. Goodness me, I never ever thought I would see G in a full piece tight ass white suit. DH and I went as Bonnie & Clyde. Even though I had almost no voice left (from having this darn flu), we still had a good time.

Saturday was McKenna’s official first Birthday Party. It was a Clamber Club party. Such fun. They set up obstacle courses for the kids. Everyone had a blast. Up and down, round about. Think they all got a good work out.

Half way through the party…. My heart nearly stopped….. McK was bouncing on this bouncy ball thing. It slipped out of her control and she fell quite hard on her bum. She let out this scream, so I run to pick her up. Once we get back to the seating area, I try to get her to stand. But she just collapsed. I was still trying to hold her up, I looked at her and her eyes were big and glazed over. She was out of it for like 5 seconds. (Felt like 20 minutes to my mommy heart). I shouted at her, and then she let out a scream. 10 minutes later she was back out playing and singing with the rest of the kids. Now I have no idea what the hell just happened. But I got the fright of my life. She must just have had a “shock reaction” or DH said, maybe with the fall she pinched a nerve. I’ve been keeping an eye on her, but she is perfect. I will just never forget her face. I could hardly sleep last night, the whole scene kept replaying in my head. Everyone has convinced me that she is ok. I’m sure she is.

Today we had another Birthday party. Another friend of Mck’s. WOW!!! They had a “Party Bus” for the kids. Totally awesome. It takes about 25 kids. They go driving around the block, singing songs. Then all the kids get their faces painted. On the bus they have Cotton Candy and Pop corn machines. Also a “slush puppy” (snow cones) machine. If the jumping castle wasn’t enough, they also were entertained by a puppet show. We are so doing the Party Bus for McK’s 5th Bday next year. Although browsing through their brochure, I’m quite keen on the “Foam Party”. Might have to do that for my bday.

All 3 of us are dead tired. DH has made some popcorn, so let me be off.... going to watch a movie...

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Told you so.....


Let the games begin!!!!



Do I get irritated when our sites go down for “routine maintenance”…? YES!!! Especially when I woke up with all these ideas of what I wanted to do today. I psyche myself up and skip into the office so excited. Only to find a “sorry we are down for maintenance”.

Can’t they do maintenance during the night, when I don’t want to work???????

In other TTC related news. Our little break is turning into a something else. I have started with the OPKs, I’m almost certain I’ll get a positive today. Also going to start using Pre~Seed as soon as I get the + OPK.

Did I mention that I’ve come down with the flu of some sorts? Weird. Not so much flu but this nasty cough and sore throat. I bought some cough syrup, yes the one that only contains Guaifenesien… It will help with my chest and that other area too……. ;-)

Oh, and I have to mention how freaking adorable my daughter is getting. I love this age. 4 and a bit. She is just so lovable. And CLEVER!! The things she comes up with and her reasoning behind everything is so amazing.

Monday, August 25, 2008

I’m so very excited to report that from today I’ll be POAS again. Yes, it’s OPK time again. Now I don’t know whether I’m excited about the actual OPK and the fact that it shows you your LH surge and when you are going to ovulate… or the actual act of peeing on something again. Yeah I know….. you don’t even have to say it.

I was thinking of going the Pre~Seed route this time too. But we’ll see. I also remembered that you can actually use raw egg whites as a lube. Now I love eggs, but really I prefer eggs on toast than up my hoo-haa….

It’s such an exciting week ahead. I should O between Wednesday and Friday.

Oh, our date night was LOVELY. Had a really good time. We should so do it more often!! Can’t give too many details, as some things should just be kept private…. And besides my dad reads this blog too………..

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Oh come on....

You got to be kidding me... where is the camera?? I'm sure I must be on some sort of show....

Today's snippet of my star sign.... I think I need to unsubscribe to this service, it's driving me insane...

You'll be impossible to control, satisfy or stifle -- but please do take mercy on the diners at the next table who were probably hoping for a nice, quiet dinner out.

DH is taking me out tonight, "date night"..... LOL.... hope I don't upset anyone......

DH and I haven't been out together, alone, for almost a year... yes a year... sure we have been out to gigs and parties together..... but not ALONE, just the two of us. (Now I'm singing that song... just the two of us, we can make it if we try, just the two of us.....)

He wanted to take me out for a nice romantic dinner, but I've convinced him to rather take me to our favourite pub instead. I've been dying for their Chilli Nacho's for quite some time now.


Friday, August 22, 2008

You have a headache, you didn't sleep well last night and everyone seems to want something from you. Just this once, refuse. Even omnipotent multitaskers are entitled to downtime. This definitely wouldn't be the best day to make that major pitch to the boss. Come up with a creative excuse, rework the idea, then give 'em hell

Yes another "today's star sign". I swear someone is spying on me. I got to start checking my house for cameras. Yes I have a headache, yes I didn't sleep well.... and yes I have an email inbox with plenty of requests for help.......

But I'm not going to refuse......

I'm counting down the hours to our new life..... a new stress free life. Well not totally stress free, but a hell of a lot better..... Can't wait. :)

But first I need breakfast..........

Oh AF has packed her bags. Please oh Please let it be the last time I see her. I've also decided that I'm already 7 days PG. Yip, 7 days.... Aint no one gonna tell me otherwise.... I'm PG until proven otherwise......

PS, 5 points goes to the person who notices that my date stamp is wrong!!! Hello Blogger, it's Friday!! Not Thursday!!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Having your feelings isn't an emotional indulgence. It's something that is necessary for your mental and physical health. If you need to, take time off -- and no major decisions.

Why is the universe telling me that I should actually be on a TTC break. I have had 4 people over the last week tell me to take time off, now I open my email and get a star sign that says take time off.

BLAH to you!!! To all of you!!!

Ok, we won’t make any major decisions regarding TTC at the moment. That has to wait till January when our Medical is back on track. But I have decided to give the SMEP another shot this cycle. I just have to inform my DH about this. I wonder if he will need much convincing…….

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Crash landing.....


I woke up this morning to a beautiful temp of 37.00 I was grinning ear to ear. Wow 37.00 and no spotting. WOW......

I walk to the fridge to get something to drink. I think to myself, should I test... not wait till tomorrow. No wait, maybe I should. No wait rather till tomorrow. Rather just go P and climb back into bed.

While sitting on the loo, I think... hmmm maybe I should just test.... no wait......

Then I realize, AF has arrived in full glory. CRASH LANDING.....

So instead of grabbing the HPT next to me, I was searching for pads in the cabinet.


Hello cycle 30 TTC. Flucking 30.......

On a side note. If you haven't joined our Making Babies Network yet. PLEASE DO :) I would love to see the place grow and grow and become more interactive. There are already such awesome ladies on the network.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Scared huh???

Yeah, AF you scared aren’t you? I have even managed to keep your sister at bay too. Or is SPOT hiding just down the road??? Or are you both having a good giggle at my expense?.... Making me think that maybe just maybe you both will be a no show this cycle??

Please tell me you have bought a one way ticket to Bermuda!!!!!! PLEASE!!! I hear the weather is lovely there this time of year.

I’m NOT getting excited, believe me. I’ve been down this road way too many times. So here is me not being excited, but still having a little bit of hope. A tiny microscopic bit of hope.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Trying to lure her...

Yip, AF’s evil twin sister SPOT. She paid me a visit on Monday and yesterday. But has seemed to have disappeared today. I’m attempting to lure her back out by publicly announcing that she is gone!!!

Come on I dare you SPOT, I freaking dare you!!!!! It’s 12dpo(I think) and 3 BFNs later, and you thought I wasn’t counting days this cycle hey…. Well some things can’t be helped. My TTC obsession is one of them.

I had this strange thought yesterday. You know people say “it will happen when it is meant to happen”…. Well, if that is true…. Then I should be happy with every month/cycle that passes, cause then I’m getting closer and closer to when it’s supposed to happen right??? LOL …………. Yeah, did I fool any of you into thinking I’m ok with another failed cycle???? Or that I’m going to fall for that sh*t, when it’s meant to happen……. LOL It was meant to happen 29 cycles ago…. That’s when….

Ok, I’m going to click on submit post now… any second now… come on SPOT, I dare you…..

Monday, August 11, 2008

We had such a great weekend. I’m a hotel loving kind of girl. You know I need all the creature comforts. I don’t do well in the bush. Until this weekend…..We went away with M&H and another Friend Couple (L&F). To a farm about 40km outside of Britz. It was M’s bday on Friday. This is the first time we have actually done something for his bday. We usually have a small braai or dinner. But this year it was a glorious weekend away.


Our accommodation was 3 old but very comfortable caravans with a lovely area in the middle for making huge bon fires. We were at the end of the farm, so we were pretty much secluded. Very peaceful. Every now and then some horses would pass by and stop for a chat. Our evenings consisted of sitting around the fire playing Poker or 30 Seconds. We even managed to get a good game of charades in. All good fun. I think I got over the fear of making my name ass in front of other people. Our days consisted of food and water fights. Of which McK hid away, didn’t want to know anything. She was so disgusted that we adults could throw cupcakes at each other. And you should have seen her face when DH threw a bucket of ice cold water on me. I think she thought I was going to do some seriously bodily harm to her daddy. Which I almost did.

McK thoroughly enjoyed the whole weekend.. She was in her element. I’m so proud of her. Not once did she complain or throw a tantrum. She was on her very best behavior. Now those that know, my lil angel doesn’t swear at all. She will give you the evil eye if you say a naughty word. Saturday morning after watching the sun rise, we were sitting on a blanket colouring in. Every now and then this strange smell would come over the dam. So I say to DH, “Sjoe, but it does smell a bit hey?”… McK looks up from her colouring book, and says “maybe it’s from the crocodile crap…” DH and I almost fell off our chairs. It was so funny. Then when she realized what she had said, she went blood red with embarrassment and proceeded to tell me that she meant crocodile poo. And that crap is an adult word…… “Since mommy uses crap a lot”…… Note to self, watch your language usage in front of the child.

Oh and I Marcelle, peed behind a tree…. not once… but about 15 times. Now this is BIG for me. P-ing in the open bush. What an accomplishment. I don’t think I’ll ever be the same again LOL.

Here are a few more photos from the weekend… Enjoy….





Thursday, August 7, 2008

I couldn’t think of a title for today’s post, so I’m just going to leave it. No one is really interested in the title really, more the actual post itself. So here goes.

I found a fertility clinic in our area. I didn’t even know they existed until I got a link from a TTC friend. They seem like a really good clinic and from what I hear very affordable. Which we all know is a plus factor. I’m thinking about making an appointment to see them in January.

I hate changing doctors, but maybe it’s time to go see a proper FS. This is a big decision to make. I always said we would stop our TTC journey if Clomid didn’t work. I don’t know if we want to go to the next level. Not that I have anything against the next level : ) Just that I never pictured myself almost 2 and a half years down the TTC road with still no BFP.

A little voice in me, keeps whispering maybe you should just make peace with the fact that you aren’t going to have another child. Or that it will eventually happen, just be patient. I don’t know any more.

I’m feeling rather down today. But it’s got nothing really to do with TTC itself. Just today in general. Things that have happened in the last 24 hours. I just keep telling myself that in 3 weeks it will be better. Just 3 more weeks.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

A change is as good.....

as a holiday. Do you think this applies to blogs too???

Sorry I got tired of the big purple rose. Needed a change. :)

Monday, August 4, 2008

Enough with winter already

We had such awesome weather the whole weekend, only to wake up to a cold miserable winter’s day today. I really thought winter was over with. I guess there is nothing really I can do about it hey?? Just hoping it clears up for our weekend away that is coming up this Friday.

I’m so tired this morning. DH was up just after 3am. He was supposed to only get up at 4:30am, since he has meetings in Johannesburg today. But for some reason he couldn’t sleep. I still can’t believe how much noise he makes. Toilets flushing, bath water running, doors swinging open and shut. Coughing, more coughing, more coughing. Luckily McK slept through it all. I was only to glad to see him go at 5am, so that I could just get an extra hours sleep….Madness I tell you. If it was me, I would have tip toed around the house and not made peep….

The weekend was so much fun. We spent most of it with our dear friends M&H. Saturday we had a fish braai at their place and played some poker. I’m pretty sure I would have won if H didn’t start nailing us on each round. Good game though!!

Yesterday we met up at this pub which has their own “beach section”. While sitting there you feel like you are on some island. We just needed some breaking waves to complete the scene. All the tables and chairs (seating area) is on beach sand. Makes you want to take off your shoes and play with the sand between your toes. McK had a great time entertaining herself with stones, bags and sand. She was just too cute.

Thanks M&H for such a cool weekend. We needed that little distraction. Of course this weekend coming up is going to be fantastic too. If this weather will just play along.

On the TTC front, I don’t know hey…… It’s not going to happen this month. I don’t know when I Oed, and we have definitely missed the boat. So I don’t think we stand any chance at all. And I’m ok with that. It’s going to be a welcomed change not to be obsessing. So hello 2ww….. I won’t be taking too much notice of you…..

Our Making Babies Network is also growing nicely. Although I would really like to see more members soon. Please visit Making Babies to register.... :)

Thursday, July 31, 2008


Is just giving me one hell of a headache.

Remember the money we are supposed to be getting from the Tax man. Well they sent it to DH’s old bank account. Which we found out has been closed. So now we need to open a new account. Or get DH signing rights on my account. (We have been using my account as a “joint” account for quite some time now anyway). But would you believe his ID has gone missing. We only have a copy of it.

The lady at the bank won’t accept the copy which I understand completely. So we need to get the copy certified by the police. But in order to have something certified as a copy, you need to have the original. The bank lady keeps telling us, go to the police get it certified…. Yes I understand but… then she says “they will certify it with the original”… HELLO??? If we had the original ID why would we want to get the copy certified. But in any case. We had to get an affidavit that declares the Original has been “stolen” and blah blah.. So we now have documents stating that. Hopefully the bank will accept that and just reopen DH’s account.

The Making Babies website is also down. I’m so frustrated. I think there is a problem with the server. We have been trying all morning to get hold of our hosting company. I hate it when a site is down. It doesn’t look good. So hopefully it will be up and running soon. It better….

I can not believe its 31 July today. The year is going by way too fast for my liking. Winter is almost done, YAY another month until Spring. Hey maybe we will get a Spring BFP…. Wouldn’t that be cool….

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

What a good week...

So far….. :-)

We got a nice little surprise this morning from the Tax man. He is actually refunding us. YAY!! Ok, it’s not thousands…. But it will be nice spending money for our weekend away. (8-10 August)….

Most importantly…… And by the sure Grace of God…. I’m thrilled to announce that my dear friend H is PREGNANT!!! Yes, H if you are reading this…. YOU MY FRIEND ARE PREGNANT!!! You are freaking at long last PREGNANT….. I’ve been bouncing off the walls since Monday’s first BFP and now with the second beta result in… I’m smiling even bigger!! I can only begin to imagine what you are feeling. Wishing you everything of the best hun. You and your precious beanie!!

Monday, July 28, 2008

My star sign today....

You find that your life has become ten times easier, seemingly overnight! It's a great day to try new things and to tackle projects that you used to think might be too much for you on your own.

Ok yes, my life will be 10 times easier within the next month. I can’t wait!!! How lovely it’s going to be to have an “easier” life. With minimized stress. Feels too good to be true.

Not sure what new things I’m supposed to do today. But I did go jogging with my sister this morning. I never wanted to do it alone, so now that I’m doing it with her. Maybe that is the “too much for you on your own”… We’ll see….

I don’t pay much attention to star signs, but do like them when they count in my favour.

I had my faith restored in TTC today. : )

Friday, July 25, 2008

Hello readers....

I noticed yesterday I had 36 visitors to my blog. Anyone want to say hello??? Leave me a comment, would love to know who is reading my blog…..

Our “Making Babies Social Network” is growing, slowly but it’s growing. If you would like to join, please send me an email marcellem@makingbabies.co.za

DH and I are still on our high from yesterday. He went this morning and signed contracts with the new company. YAY!! And worked out the salary structure and all that jazz. I can finally stop stressing and start giving 100% attention to Making Babies.. (hahaha, I mean both Making Babies the business and Making Babies for ourselves…..)

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Even Greater NEWS!!

DH got the job. He got the freaking JOB!! I can’t even begin to explain how absolutely thrilled I am!!

Here are some pics from our get away, I can’t seem to get them resized correctly without blurring them. Sorry but these will just have to do…..

Making a fire (BBQ/Braai)

DH just relaxing

Playing Putt Putt (Miniature Golf)

DH and McK Swimming

DH and McK on the golf course


I would like to introduce you to the "Making Babies Social Community Network."

My father convinced me to create this Network. It works pretty much on the same principle as Face Book. You have your own profile and can interact with other TTC members. Members are either waiting to TTC or officially on the TTC train. I think it can grow into a community full of support and advice. What I like about it, is that only members can see your profile/info. You have to be a registered member in order to view the site.

Please click here to join.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Hello there...

Sorry I left you hanging. Lets get the nasty stuff out of the way first. AF came in full force on Monday. Luckily I was kept so busy the last two days I haven’t even really thought about it.
We went away for 2 days with the in laws. Will post some pics later. Had a lovely time, it was a nice distraction from real life.
At the moment we have decided to take a Medicated/Surgery break from TTC. So it’s going to be all natural TTC until September, maybe even January. I’m supposed to go for a LAP now, but in all honesty I’m just not up to it right now. I know everyone is saying if you go for it now and there are problems you can get it sorted out sooner than waiting for January. I might even go in September. We will just see how it all pans out.
There are a few things that need to be sorted out before we take that next step. Hopefully DH will hear about the new job today. And there are a few medical aid issues that I need to get sorted out as well.
Anyway, I have loads of work to catch up on. Shame, my dad took over running Making Babies the last two days. He did such a good job. Thanks DAD!!!!
Will be back later with pics!!

Friday, July 18, 2008

Up and Up!

That is what my temps are doing. Half of me wants to be really excited and over confident that this might be it… the other half agrees that this is just a cruel joke my body is trying to pull on me. It’s a tug of war between the halves today.

I’m getting so much positive support from everyone, it’s hard. I don’t know who will be more disappointed if AF arrives. Me or them?

We will just have to think happy thoughts. Yes I have been testing, and yes those tests are stark white. No lines even starting to creep up. But I’m going with the fact that maybe it is just too early. Or maybe I’m just not PG. See tug of war again.

DH has his second call back interview today. I’m crossing everything I can. Please let him get the job!!! PLEASE!!

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

I Shouldn't!!!!!

Do this to myself. But I’m going to. I’m going to get excited about the possibility of maybe being PG. Although I have no symptoms to report, I’m stupidly excited about my chart…. You can find my link to my chart in my Link list over to the right.

I think, I’m hoping, I’m praying that yesterdays temp was a implant dip. Even though it was a small one….. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!

I know I shouldn’t get so excited and even admit it. But it sure beats that “fluck I’m not PG feeling”. I’m so scared of the disappointment I’m setting myself up for. I’m going to fall hard, very hard. Please someone have one of those fireman trampolines/safety nets ready for me.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Hello Monday....

It’s been a hectic weekend. Filled with lots of emotions, cries, laughter and smiles. I’m just so thankful that I have good friends to share it all with. I’m glad we can be there for each other and have someone to lean on.

McK of course had a great weekend. She slept over at her Uncle Precious house on Friday night. Can you believe her and her Uncle stayed up till 1am watching South Park.. and other cartoons… But hello, I don’t think SP is appropriate for a 4 year old. LOL.

Then on Saturday we went to friends of ours that we haven’t seen in ages. It was nice catching up with them. It is great getting another opinion on what is going on in our lives. It was great getting an excited response about DH’s job interview today. McK got to play with her “boyfriend”. And they had a great time. It’s so nice that McK can speak Afrikaans so well, so now there are no language barriers between the two. So sweet.


Yesterday was a tough day. But I’m glad we got through it. There were things that needed to be said and a lot of emotions/feelings were opened up. Its always good to get things out there. That way everyone knows what we are all dealing with. You can’t keep heart ache to yourself. You need to share it. We don’t always have the answers, but we sure have a lot of love to give. I think we (DH and I) benefited a lot by our conversation yesterday with our close friends. I’m sure it was just as good for them to get their feelings out. I feel as if we are now on the same level. Well sort of. I can’t feel their heartache, but I can try to understand it.

I almost don't want to jinx it, but DH is going for a job interview today. PLEASE cross fingers and toes that he gets it!!!

Oh and we have just entered the 1ww :) Almost testing time!!!