What a weekend we had…….

Started off Friday night with a friend’s “House Farewell” party. The theme was “From the History Books”. Must say there were some very good costumes. But my favourite was my brother’s Elvis suit. Goodness me, I never ever thought I would see G in a full piece tight ass white suit. DH and I went as Bonnie & Clyde. Even though I had almost no voice left (from having this darn flu), we still had a good time.

Saturday was McKenna’s official first Birthday Party. It was a Clamber Club party. Such fun. They set up obstacle courses for the kids. Everyone had a blast. Up and down, round about. Think they all got a good work out.

Half way through the party…. My heart nearly stopped….. McK was bouncing on this bouncy ball thing. It slipped out of her control and she fell quite hard on her bum. She let out this scream, so I run to pick her up. Once we get back to the seating area, I try to get her to stand. But she just collapsed. I was still trying to hold her up, I looked at her and her eyes were big and glazed over. She was out of it for like 5 seconds. (Felt like 20 minutes to my mommy heart). I shouted at her, and then she let out a scream. 10 minutes later she was back out playing and singing with the rest of the kids. Now I have no idea what the hell just happened. But I got the fright of my life. She must just have had a “shock reaction” or DH said, maybe with the fall she pinched a nerve. I’ve been keeping an eye on her, but she is perfect. I will just never forget her face. I could hardly sleep last night, the whole scene kept replaying in my head. Everyone has convinced me that she is ok. I’m sure she is.

Today we had another Birthday party. Another friend of Mck’s. WOW!!! They had a “Party Bus” for the kids. Totally awesome. It takes about 25 kids. They go driving around the block, singing songs. Then all the kids get their faces painted. On the bus they have Cotton Candy and Pop corn machines. Also a “slush puppy” (snow cones) machine. If the jumping castle wasn’t enough, they also were entertained by a puppet show. We are so doing the Party Bus for McK’s 5th Bday next year. Although browsing through their brochure, I’m quite keen on the “Foam Party”. Might have to do that for my bday.

All 3 of us are dead tired. DH has made some popcorn, so let me be off.... going to watch a movie...

Told you so.....

Let the games begin!!!!

:)

Maintenance.......

Do I get irritated when our sites go down for “routine maintenance”…? YES!!! Especially when I woke up with all these ideas of what I wanted to do today. I psyche myself up and skip into the office so excited. Only to find a “sorry we are down for maintenance”.

Can’t they do maintenance during the night, when I don’t want to work???????

In other TTC related news. Our little break is turning into a something else. I have started with the OPKs, I’m almost certain I’ll get a positive today. Also going to start using Pre~Seed as soon as I get the + OPK.

Did I mention that I’ve come down with the flu of some sorts? Weird. Not so much flu but this nasty cough and sore throat. I bought some cough syrup, yes the one that only contains Guaifenesien… It will help with my chest and that other area too……. ;-)

Oh, and I have to mention how freaking adorable my daughter is getting. I love this age. 4 and a bit. She is just so lovable. And CLEVER!! The things she comes up with and her reasoning behind everything is so amazing.

I’m so very excited to report that from today I’ll be POAS again. Yes, it’s OPK time again. Now I don’t know whether I’m excited about the actual OPK and the fact that it shows you your LH surge and when you are going to ovulate… or the actual act of peeing on something again. Yeah I know….. you don’t even have to say it.

I was thinking of going the Pre~Seed route this time too. But we’ll see. I also remembered that you can actually use raw egg whites as a lube. Now I love eggs, but really I prefer eggs on toast than up my hoo-haa….

It’s such an exciting week ahead. I should O between Wednesday and Friday.

Oh, our date night was LOVELY. Had a really good time. We should so do it more often!! Can’t give too many details, as some things should just be kept private…. And besides my dad reads this blog too………..

Oh come on....

You got to be kidding me... where is the camera?? I'm sure I must be on some sort of show....

Today's snippet of my star sign.... I think I need to unsubscribe to this service, it's driving me insane...

You'll be impossible to control, satisfy or stifle -- but please do take mercy on the diners at the next table who were probably hoping for a nice, quiet dinner out.

DH is taking me out tonight, "date night"..... LOL.... hope I don't upset anyone......

DH and I haven't been out together, alone, for almost a year... yes a year... sure we have been out to gigs and parties together..... but not ALONE, just the two of us. (Now I'm singing that song... just the two of us, we can make it if we try, just the two of us.....)

He wanted to take me out for a nice romantic dinner, but I've convinced him to rather take me to our favourite pub instead. I've been dying for their Chilli Nacho's for quite some time now.

:)

You have a headache, you didn't sleep well last night and everyone seems to want something from you. Just this once, refuse. Even omnipotent multitaskers are entitled to downtime. This definitely wouldn't be the best day to make that major pitch to the boss. Come up with a creative excuse, rework the idea, then give 'em hell

Yes another "today's star sign". I swear someone is spying on me. I got to start checking my house for cameras. Yes I have a headache, yes I didn't sleep well.... and yes I have an email inbox with plenty of requests for help.......

But I'm not going to refuse......

I'm counting down the hours to our new life..... a new stress free life. Well not totally stress free, but a hell of a lot better..... Can't wait. :)

But first I need breakfast..........

Oh AF has packed her bags. Please oh Please let it be the last time I see her. I've also decided that I'm already 7 days PG. Yip, 7 days.... Aint no one gonna tell me otherwise.... I'm PG until proven otherwise......

PS, 5 points goes to the person who notices that my date stamp is wrong!!! Hello Blogger, it's Friday!! Not Thursday!!

Having your feelings isn't an emotional indulgence. It's something that is necessary for your mental and physical health. If you need to, take time off -- and no major decisions.

Why is the universe telling me that I should actually be on a TTC break. I have had 4 people over the last week tell me to take time off, now I open my email and get a star sign that says take time off.

BLAH to you!!! To all of you!!!

Ok, we won’t make any major decisions regarding TTC at the moment. That has to wait till January when our Medical is back on track. But I have decided to give the SMEP another shot this cycle. I just have to inform my DH about this. I wonder if he will need much convincing…….

Crash landing.....

**SIGH**

I woke up this morning to a beautiful temp of 37.00 I was grinning ear to ear. Wow 37.00 and no spotting. WOW......

I walk to the fridge to get something to drink. I think to myself, should I test... not wait till tomorrow. No wait, maybe I should. No wait rather till tomorrow. Rather just go P and climb back into bed.

While sitting on the loo, I think... hmmm maybe I should just test.... no wait......

Then I realize, AF has arrived in full glory. CRASH LANDING.....

So instead of grabbing the HPT next to me, I was searching for pads in the cabinet.

**SIGH**

Hello cycle 30 TTC. Flucking 30.......

On a side note. If you haven't joined our Making Babies Network yet. PLEASE DO :) I would love to see the place grow and grow and become more interactive. There are already such awesome ladies on the network.

Scared huh???

Yeah, AF you scared aren’t you? I have even managed to keep your sister at bay too. Or is SPOT hiding just down the road??? Or are you both having a good giggle at my expense?.... Making me think that maybe just maybe you both will be a no show this cycle??

Please tell me you have bought a one way ticket to Bermuda!!!!!! PLEASE!!! I hear the weather is lovely there this time of year.

I’m NOT getting excited, believe me. I’ve been down this road way too many times. So here is me not being excited, but still having a little bit of hope. A tiny microscopic bit of hope.

Trying to lure her...

Yip, AF’s evil twin sister SPOT. She paid me a visit on Monday and yesterday. But has seemed to have disappeared today. I’m attempting to lure her back out by publicly announcing that she is gone!!!

Come on I dare you SPOT, I freaking dare you!!!!! It’s 12dpo(I think) and 3 BFNs later, and you thought I wasn’t counting days this cycle hey…. Well some things can’t be helped. My TTC obsession is one of them.

I had this strange thought yesterday. You know people say “it will happen when it is meant to happen”…. Well, if that is true…. Then I should be happy with every month/cycle that passes, cause then I’m getting closer and closer to when it’s supposed to happen right??? LOL …………. Yeah, did I fool any of you into thinking I’m ok with another failed cycle???? Or that I’m going to fall for that sh*t, when it’s meant to happen……. LOL It was meant to happen 29 cycles ago…. That’s when….

Ok, I’m going to click on submit post now… any second now… come on SPOT, I dare you…..

We had such a great weekend. I’m a hotel loving kind of girl. You know I need all the creature comforts. I don’t do well in the bush. Until this weekend…..We went away with M&H and another Friend Couple (L&F). To a farm about 40km outside of Britz. It was M’s bday on Friday. This is the first time we have actually done something for his bday. We usually have a small braai or dinner. But this year it was a glorious weekend away.



Our accommodation was 3 old but very comfortable caravans with a lovely area in the middle for making huge bon fires. We were at the end of the farm, so we were pretty much secluded. Very peaceful. Every now and then some horses would pass by and stop for a chat. Our evenings consisted of sitting around the fire playing Poker or 30 Seconds. We even managed to get a good game of charades in. All good fun. I think I got over the fear of making my name ass in front of other people. Our days consisted of food and water fights. Of which McK hid away, didn’t want to know anything. She was so disgusted that we adults could throw cupcakes at each other. And you should have seen her face when DH threw a bucket of ice cold water on me. I think she thought I was going to do some seriously bodily harm to her daddy. Which I almost did.

McK thoroughly enjoyed the whole weekend.. She was in her element. I’m so proud of her. Not once did she complain or throw a tantrum. She was on her very best behavior. Now those that know, my lil angel doesn’t swear at all. She will give you the evil eye if you say a naughty word. Saturday morning after watching the sun rise, we were sitting on a blanket colouring in. Every now and then this strange smell would come over the dam. So I say to DH, “Sjoe, but it does smell a bit hey?”… McK looks up from her colouring book, and says “maybe it’s from the crocodile crap…” DH and I almost fell off our chairs. It was so funny. Then when she realized what she had said, she went blood red with embarrassment and proceeded to tell me that she meant crocodile poo. And that crap is an adult word…… “Since mommy uses crap a lot”…… Note to self, watch your language usage in front of the child.

Oh and I Marcelle, peed behind a tree…. not once… but about 15 times. Now this is BIG for me. P-ing in the open bush. What an accomplishment. I don’t think I’ll ever be the same again LOL.

Here are a few more photos from the weekend… Enjoy….

I couldn’t think of a title for today’s post, so I’m just going to leave it. No one is really interested in the title really, more the actual post itself. So here goes.

I found a fertility clinic in our area. I didn’t even know they existed until I got a link from a TTC friend. They seem like a really good clinic and from what I hear very affordable. Which we all know is a plus factor. I’m thinking about making an appointment to see them in January.

I hate changing doctors, but maybe it’s time to go see a proper FS. This is a big decision to make. I always said we would stop our TTC journey if Clomid didn’t work. I don’t know if we want to go to the next level. Not that I have anything against the next level : ) Just that I never pictured myself almost 2 and a half years down the TTC road with still no BFP.

A little voice in me, keeps whispering maybe you should just make peace with the fact that you aren’t going to have another child. Or that it will eventually happen, just be patient. I don’t know any more.

I’m feeling rather down today. But it’s got nothing really to do with TTC itself. Just today in general. Things that have happened in the last 24 hours. I just keep telling myself that in 3 weeks it will be better. Just 3 more weeks.

A change is as good.....

as a holiday. Do you think this applies to blogs too???

Sorry I got tired of the big purple rose. Needed a change. :)

Enough with winter already

We had such awesome weather the whole weekend, only to wake up to a cold miserable winter’s day today. I really thought winter was over with. I guess there is nothing really I can do about it hey?? Just hoping it clears up for our weekend away that is coming up this Friday.

I’m so tired this morning. DH was up just after 3am. He was supposed to only get up at 4:30am, since he has meetings in Johannesburg today. But for some reason he couldn’t sleep. I still can’t believe how much noise he makes. Toilets flushing, bath water running, doors swinging open and shut. Coughing, more coughing, more coughing. Luckily McK slept through it all. I was only to glad to see him go at 5am, so that I could just get an extra hours sleep….Madness I tell you. If it was me, I would have tip toed around the house and not made peep….

The weekend was so much fun. We spent most of it with our dear friends M&H. Saturday we had a fish braai at their place and played some poker. I’m pretty sure I would have won if H didn’t start nailing us on each round. Good game though!!

Yesterday we met up at this pub which has their own “beach section”. While sitting there you feel like you are on some island. We just needed some breaking waves to complete the scene. All the tables and chairs (seating area) is on beach sand. Makes you want to take off your shoes and play with the sand between your toes. McK had a great time entertaining herself with stones, bags and sand. She was just too cute.

Thanks M&H for such a cool weekend. We needed that little distraction. Of course this weekend coming up is going to be fantastic too. If this weather will just play along.

On the TTC front, I don’t know hey…… It’s not going to happen this month. I don’t know when I Oed, and we have definitely missed the boat. So I don’t think we stand any chance at all. And I’m ok with that. It’s going to be a welcomed change not to be obsessing. So hello 2ww….. I won’t be taking too much notice of you…..

Our Making Babies Network is also growing nicely. Although I would really like to see more members soon. Please visit Making Babies to register.... :)