Monday, November 16, 2009

Pregnancy vs Baby

As I was holding my friend's baby on Saturday morning, I looked down at him ran my finger across his face and smiled. Inside my heart skipped a beat and stung a bit. I realized looking down at his precious little face, while stroking his teeny toes that this might be the closet I get to holding a baby again for a very long time. I was a bit sad that I wouldn't be holding my own very soon. As in - not for a few years at least. But I enjoyed meeting this little guy who we have been planning for so long. It was awesome to have him in real life there, cooing back at you.

(Then my McK ran past and I realized I love her 5 year old toes too, and I am incredibly lucky and blessed to have her.)

Motherhood is a challenge. It's the hardest job you will ever have, and yes it will be the most awesome one too. But it got me thinking, do you want to be pregnant or have a baby? Odd question? I don't think so.

There were many times when I would think I just wanted to be pregnant. To recapture that what I lost with my pregnancy with McK. There are so many things I wanted to do differently. Then I would feel overwhelmed thinking that at the end of 9 months there would actually be a baby. A real person. It wouldn't just be two lines on a HPT. It wouldn't be that first u/s with a beating heart. It wouldn't just be that first kick. There would actually be a baby at the end....

Babies grow up into 5 year old's... and 5 year old's grow into teenagers.... and teenagers... well you know the rest of this story. :) Isn't it wonderful that something so important as two lines on a pee stick can develop into a life changing situation. Even if you aren't prepared for the full package yet.

1 comments:

Christie - Childhood 101 said...

It took me along time to get used to the idea of being pregnant and then once I had it seemed to be over way to quickly. Having a baby, well that was just the icing on the cake, and I love icing.